Reaching and Teaching: Promoting Safety (Video #188)

Reaching and Teaching: Promoting Safety (Video #188)


HELLO. MY NAME IS BARBARA DOYLE, AND I AM A SPECIAL
EDUCATION PROFESSIONAL, AND I HAVE BEEN FOR OVER 45 YEARS. I AM ALSO A FAMILY MEMBER OF BOTH CHILDREN
AND ADULTS WITH DISABILITIES. TODAY WE WANT TO TALK ABOUT SAFETY SKILLS. SAFETY SKILLS ARE VERY IMPORTANT FOR LIFETIME
SUCCESS. UNSAFE PEOPLE HAVE MORE LIMITED LIVES. UNSAFE PEOPLE HAVE LESS POSITIVE OUTCOMES
THAN PEOPLE WHO ONLY USE SAFE BEHAVIOR. WE NEED TO BEGIN TO IDENTIFY AND TEACH SAFE
WAYS OF INTERACTING AND BEHAVING BEGINNING AT A VERY EARLY AGE. THIS VIDEO EXPLORES THE IMPORTANCE OF SAFETY
SKILLS. WE WILL LEARN WHAT SAFETY SKILLS ARE MOST
IMPORTANT TO TEACH, AND LET’S EXPLORE WAYS TO PRIORITIZE SAFETY SKILLS AT HOME, IN PROGRAMS
AND IN THE COMMUNITY. WHY ARE SAFETY SKILLS SO IMPORTANT? BECAUSE UNSAFE PEOPLE HAVE LIMITED LIVES. IF YOU ARE NOT SAFE, PEOPLE AREN’T GOING TO
WANT TO HAVE YOU AT THE MOVIES. THEY MIGHT NOT WANT TO INVITE YOU TO A PARTY. YOU MIGHT NOT GET TO RIDE THE BUS OR USE PUBLIC
TRANSPORTATION. UNSAFE PEOPLE HAVE LESS ACCESS TO ALL OF THE
WONDERFUL ENVIRONMENTS IN OUR SOCIETY. THEY NEED MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE AND INTRUSIVE
SUPPORTS. WHEN CHILDREN HAVE UNSAFE BEHAVIORS, WE HAVE
TO SPEND A LOT MORE MONEY AND A LOT MORE TIME JUST TRYING TO GET THEM NOT TO BE DANGEROUS. UNSAFE CHILDREN HAVE LESS PARTICIPATION AND
LESS SATISFACTION IN THEIR LIVES. PEOPLE MAY NOT WANT TO BE AROUND THEM. THE OTHER CHILDREN MAY NOT WANT TO PLAY WITH
THEM IF THEY ARE AFRAID THAT THIS CHILD WILL HIT THEM OR THROW SOMETHING OR DO SOMETHING
ELSE THAT IS POTENTIALLY HARMFUL. UNSAFE PEOPLE DON’T BELONG TO GROUPS AS WELL
AS SAFE PEOPLE DO. SO BEING UNSAFE CAN CAUSE YOU TO HAVE AN ISOLATED
LIFE WHERE OTHER PEOPLE JUST DON’T WANT TO BE AROUND YOU AND SO YOU ARE ALONE MOST OF
THE TIME. AND VERY UNFORTUNATELY, IF YOU ARE AN UNSAFE
CHILD OR ADULT, AS YOU GROW OLDER, THE OUTCOMES CAN BE EVEN WORSE. UNSAFE PEOPLE CAN END UP IN JAIL, INSTITUTIONALIZED,
CHRONICALLY DEPRESSED, CHRONICALLY ISOLATED OR DEAD. THAT’S HOW IMPORTANT IT IS FOR US TO ADDRESS
UNSAFE BEHAVIORS. WE DON’T WANT THOSE KINDS OF OUTCOMES FOR
OUR CHILDREN. SO AT THE EARLIEST POSSIBLE AGE STARTING TODAY,
WE WANT TO ELIMINATE BEHAVIORS THAT ARE A DANGER TO THE CHILD THEMSELVES OR WHEN THE
CHILD ENDANGERS OTHERS. WE WANT TO ELIMINATE BEHAVIORS THAT COULD
BE MISINTERPRETED AS CRIMINAL LATER ON AS THEY GET A LITTLE OLDER. AND WE WANT TO ELIMINATE BEHAVIORS THAT COULD
CAUSE THE PERSON TO BE VICTIMIZED. WE ALSO WANT TO IDENTIFY POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS
BEHAVIOR, BEHAVIOR THAT ISN’T HARMFUL NOW, BUT COULD BE IN THE FUTURE. AN EXAMPLE MIGHT BE OF A LITTLE THREE YEAR
OLD WHO PUSHES PEOPLE, AND MAYBE THEY PUSH THE PERSON IN THE LEGS AND THE PERSON DOESN’T
FALL OR ANYTHING BECAUSE THEY ARE ONLY THREE YEARS OLD. BUT WHAT IF THEY PUSH SOMEBODY WHO IS STANDING
AT THE TOP OF A FLIGHT OF CONCRETE STEPS, AND THAT PERSON FALLS AND IS HARMED? NOW THAT CHILD WOULD BE VIEWED AS A DANGER
TO SOCIETY. SO WE WANT TO LOOK AT BEHAVIOR THAT COULD
BECOME DANGEROUS AND ADDRESS IT RIGHT AWAY. WE ALSO WANT TO ADDRESS THE BEHAVIORS THAT
WE NOW CONTROL. SO SAY FOR EXAMPLE, THERE IS A LITTLE CHILD
THAT RUNS AWAY IF YOU LET GO OF THEIR HAND, AND SO WE CONTROL THAT BY ALWAYS HOLDING THEIR
HAND OR PERHAPS THERE IS A CHILD WHO RUNS OUT THE FRONT DOOR WITHOUT PERMISSION INTO
AN UNSAFE ENVIRONMENT, AND WE TAKE CARE OF THAT BY LOCKING THE DOOR OR HAVING SOMEONE
STOP THEM. THOSE ARE POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS SITUATIONS
THAT WE NOW CONTROL, BUT WHAT IF THOSE CONTROLS WEREN’T PRESENT? SO THOSE BEHAVIORS ALSO BECOME VERY HIGH ON
OUR LIST OF BEHAVIORS TO CHANGE. I LIKE TO THINK ABOUT BEHAVIOR IN FOUR CATEGORIES
SO WE CAN DETERMINE WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT TO ADDRESS FIRST AND PRIORITIZE IN THAT WAY. CONVENTIONAL BEHAVIOR IS BEHAVIOR THAT IS
PRETTY MUCH WHAT EVERYBODY DOES, AND IT IS NOT A PROBLEM TO ANYONE, AND IT LOOKS PRETTY
MUCH LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE LOOKS. UNCONVENTIONAL BEHAVIOR IS NOT EXACTLY WHAT
EVERYONE ELSE DOES, BUT IT IS NOT REALLY A PROBLEM. SO IF A CHILD LIKES TO WEAR HIS PANTS PULLED
UP HIGH OR IF HE LIKES TO HAVE HIS SANDWICH CUT IN A CERTAIN WAY THAT IS DIFFERENT FROM
OTHER PEOPLE’S, THAT MAYBE UNCONVENTIONAL, BUT IT IS REALLY NOT PROBLEMATIC. WHAT WE WANT TO DO WITH UNCONVENTIONAL BEHAVIOR
IS JUST EXPLAIN IT TO OTHER PEOPLE ESPECIALLY EXPLAIN IT TO THE CHILD’S PEERS, “OH, RANDY
LIKES TO EAT HIS SANDWICH LIKE THAT.” ONCE UNCONVENTIONAL BEHAVIOR IS EXPLAINED,
WE USUALLY DON’T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT OR SPEND MUCH TIME ON IT. AN UNCONVENTIONAL BEHAVIOR MIGHT BE NOT SAYING
PLEASE AND THANK YOU. SOMETIMES PEOPLE GET VERY INVOLVED IN TEACHING
PLEASE AND THANK YOU, WHEN, REALLY, THERE IS A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO DON’T USE IT, AND IT
IS JUST A LITTLE UNCONVENTIONAL. IT IS NOT DANGEROUS IN ANY WAY. ANOTHER KIND OF BEHAVIOR THAT IS IMPORTANT
TO THINK ABOUT IS CALLED STIGMATIZING BEHAVIOR. STIGMATIZING BEHAVIOR IS BEHAVIOR THAT SOMEONE
DOES THAT MAKES YOU NOT WANT TO BE AROUND THEM OR MAKES THEM NOT ABLE TO BE IN A CERTAIN
ENVIRONMENT. SO IF YOU GO TO A MOVIE, AND IT IS NOT A SCARY
MOVIE, AND YOU ARE SCREAMING DURING THE MOVIE, THAT’S GOING TO BE STIGMATIZING. PRETTY SOON PEOPLE ARE GOING TO SAY “GET THAT
CHILD OUT OF HERE. DON’T LET THAT PERSON IN THE MOVIE THEATER. WE DON’T WANT TO BE AROUND THAT PERSON.” OR IF A CHILD OR ADULT IS AT A BUFFET AND
THEY SERVE THEMSELVES WITH THEIR HANDS INSTEAD OF THE UTENSILS, THAT MAY NOT BE TECHNICALLY
DANGEROUS, BUT IT IS CERTAINLY STIGMATIZING. PEOPLE ARE GOING TO SAY “I DON’T WANT THAT
PERSON HERE.” THE SAME IS TRUE OF WHEN IT IS TIME TO GET
IN LINE OF NOT KNOWING HOW TO GET AT THE END OF THE LINE WHICH, BY THE WAY, TURNS OUT TO
BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN LEARNING HOW TO LINE UP IN A STRAIGHT LINE. SO THOSE ARE BEHAVIORS WE REALLY WANT TO ADDRESS,
STIGMATIZING BEHAVIORS WILL CAUSE THE CHILD TO HAVE PLACES WHERE PEOPLE DON’T WANT THEM
TO BE, AND WE WANT THEM TO BE ABLE TO BE EVERYWHERE IN THE WORLD THEY WANT TO BE. AND THEN THE FOURTH CATEGORY IS DANGEROUS
AND POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR. NOW THIS CATEGORY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT CATEGORY
TO IDENTIFY AND ADDRESS, AND I WANT YOU TO REMEMBER THAT WHEN YOU ARE ADDRESSING DANGEROUS
BEHAVIOR, WE ARE ELIMINATING IT. WE ARE NOT JUST SAYING” OH, LET’S CONTROL
IT.” WE HAVE TO CONTROL IT IF IT IS DANGEROUS AT
THE TIME. OUR REAL GOAL THIS CHILD REPLACES THAT BEHAVIOR
WITH A VARIETY OF OTHER BEHAVIORS THAT ARE NOT DANGEROUS. WELL, I HAVE A COUPLE OF RULES TO THINK ABOUT
WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR AND SAFETY. RULE NUMBER ONE IS BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU TEACH
BECAUSE SOMEBODY MIGHT LEARN IT. I KNOW THAT SOUNDS LIKE A FUNNY RULE, BUT
LET ME GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE OF A YOUNG BOY WHO WAS TAUGHT TO SHAKE HANDS WITH PEOPLE
WHEN HE MET THEM. THAT WAS CUTE AND FUN WHEN HE WAS FOUR YEARS
OLD AND SHOOK HANDS WITH THE PRINCIPAL AND HIS GRANDMOTHER. BUT BY THE TIME HE GOT TO HIGH SCHOOL AND
CHANGE OF CLASS, THAT BEHAVIOR CAUSED HIM TO BE VIEWED AS UNSAFE TO CHANGE CLASS AT
THE SAME TIME AS ALL THE OTHER STUDENTS. HE WANTED TO SHAKE THE HAND OF EVERY STUDENT
THAT HE WENT PAST. WELL, HE COULDN’T DO THAT. SO HE WAS FORCED TO NOT DO CHANGE OF CLASS
WITH THE OTHER HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS. THINGS GOT EVEN WORSE AS AN ADULT. HE BECAME A GREAT BIG MAN AND REMEMBER ALL
OUR CUTE LITTLE KIDS ARE GOING TO GROW UP TO BE BIG PEOPLE. AS A BIG MAN, HE WOULD GO INTO A GROCERY STORE
AND TRY TO GRAB EVERYBODY’S HANDS AND SHAKE THEM. WELL, PEOPLE FELT ASSAULTED. THEY FELT ATTACKED. THEY DIDN’T KNOW HE WAS A PERSON WITH A DISABILITY,
AND EVEN WHEN IT WAS EXPLAINED TO THEM, THEIR HANDS STILL HURT. THEY WERE STILL AFRAID OF HIM, AND HE WAS
EXCLUDED FROM MANY, MANY PLACES. NOW, EVEN THOUGH HE LIVES IN A SMALL CUSTOMIZED
HOME, HE CANNOT GO INTO THE COMMUNITY UNLESS THERE IS TWO MEN WITH HIM TO TAKE HIM TO MAKE
HIM NOT SHAKE THE HANDS OF THE PEOPLE HE ENCOUNTERS. SO BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU TEACH AND THINK NOW
IF I TEACH THIS TO THIS CHILD NOW, WILL IT BE OKAY WHEN THEY ARE 30. AND IF IT IS NOT GOING TO BE OKAY WHEN THEY
ARE AN ADULT, THEN DON’T TEACH THAT SKILL RIGHT NOW, TEACH SOMETHING ELSE THAT WILL
ENDURE ACROSS TIME. NOW, MY SECOND RULE IS WHAT IS CUTE AT TWO,
CAN BE LIMITING AT 13, DANGEROUS AT 23, AND CAUSE THE PERSON TO BE VICTIMIZED. FOR EXAMPLE, A LITTLE BOY WALKING OUT OF THE
BATHROOM, HE HAS JUST USED THE TOILET, AND HE STILL HAS HIS PANTS AROUND HIS FEET. HE COMES OUT OF THE BATHROOM, AND EVERYBODY
LAUGHS AND IT IS KIND OF FUNNY. WELL, IF HE DOES THAT IN THE BATHROOM AT MIDDLE
SCHOOL, HE WILL BE CONSIDERED EXTREMELY INAPPROPRIATE AND MAY EVEN BE REMOVED FROM THE SCHOOL. IF HE DOES THAT WHEN HE IS AN ADULT IN THE
BATHROOM AT THE MALL, HE COULD BE SEXUALLY VICTIMIZED BY PREDATORS WHO WILL RECOGNIZE
THAT HE DOESN’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT WHAT HE NEEDS KNOW TO BE A SAFE PERSON. SO THINK ABOUT THE BEHAVIORS YOUR CHILDREN
ARE USING NOW THAT YOU THINK ARE CUTE OR FUNNY AND DECIDE WILL THIS BE CUTE OR FUNNY WHEN
HE IS A TEEN-AGER, WHEN SHE IS AN ADULT. WILL THIS BE CUTE OTHER FUNNY WHEN HE OR SHE
GOES TO COLLEGE. REMEMBER, WE DON’T KNOW WHO IS GOING TO COLLEGE. A LOT OF OUR KIDS END UP GOING TO COLLEGE
OR GOING SOMEWHERE TO A CAMP. WE DON’T WANT THEM TO BE EXCLUDED BECAUSE
WE DIDN’T ADDRESS THESE KINDS OF BEHAVIORS EARLY ENOUGH. AND THEN RULE NUMBER THREE IS IT IS MORE IMPORTANT
WHAT YOU DO THAN WHAT YOU KNOW. A LOT OF EDUCATIONAL PROGRAMS FOCUS ON WHAT
CHILDREN KNOW, DO THEY KNOW THIS SET OF FACTS, DO THEY KNOW THEIR MATH, DO THEY KNOW THEIR
STATE CAPITALS, DO THEY KNOW HOW TO WRITE THEIR NAME. USING THOSE FEW EXAMPLES, YOU COULD LIVE YOUR
WHOLE LIFE WITHOUT THOSE. YOU COULD LIVE YOUR WHOLE LIFE AND NOT KNOW
YOUR STATE CAPITALS. BUT IF YOU GO IN SOMEBODY’S HOUSE WHEN THEY
ARE NOT HOME, THAT COULD BE MISINTERPRETED AS A CRIMINAL ACT. SO CERTAIN BEHAVIOR BECOMES MUCH MORE IMPORTANT
FOR US TO ADDRESS BECAUSE WHAT PEOPLE DO WILL TURN OUT TO BE MORE IMPORTANT THAN WHAT THEY
KNOW. SO I WILL GIVE YOU A COUPLE OF EXAMPLES WHICH
OF THESE ARE MORE IMPORTANT? IS IT MORE IMPORTANT THAT A CHILD LEARN HOW
TO COMPLETE THE TASK YOU HAVE PUT IN FRONT OF THEM OR THAT SHE LEARNS A SAFE WAY TO GET
OUT OF IT? WITHOUT THROWING IT, WITHOUT HITTING ANYONE,
WITHOUT CAUSING ANY DANGER, WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT? IS IT MORE IMPORTANT THAT A CHILD ALWAYS DO
WHAT HE IS TOLD OR THAT HE HAS A SAFE WAY TO DEMONSTRATE THAT HE CAN’T DO THAT RIGHT
NOW OR EVEN THAT HE WON’T DO THAT RIGHT NOW? WHICH IS MORE IMPORTANT? ALWAYS DOING WHAT EVERYONE SAYS OR HAVING
A SAFE WAY NOT TO DO IT? AND THEN WHAT IS MORE IMPORTANT, USING A COMPLETE
SENTENCE TO MAKE A REQUEST OR CLOSING THE BATHROOM DOOR WHEN YOU ARE USING THE TOILET? I THINK IT IS PRETTY CLEAR THAT WE KNOW WHAT
IS MORE IMPORTANT NOW THAT WE ARE STARTING TO THINK ABOUT THIS THIS WAY. SO TO CHANGE BEHAVIOR AND CREATE SAFER CHILDREN,
WHAT CAN WE DO? WELL, THE FIRST THING IS TO IDENTIFY THE FUNCTION
OF DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR. BY “FUNCTION,” I MEAN WHY IS THE CHILD RESORTING
TO DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR? WHY DOES HE HIT HIS SISTER? WHY DOES HE RUN OUT IN FRONT OF TRAFFIC? WHY DOES SHE THROW THINGS? WE NEED TO NOT DEFAULT TO SAYING IT IS BECAUSE
SHE IS SPOILED OR HE IS STUBBORN OR HE IS NOT COMPLIANT OR HE WANTS ATTENTION. SOMETIMES WE SAY THAT’S THE REASON WHY OR
HE WANTS TO AVOID A TASK. THAT’S OVERSIMPLIFIED WAY OF LOOKING AT THINGS
FROM MY POINT OF VIEW. FROM MY POINT OF VIEW, CHILDREN WITH DISABILITIES
ARE ALWAYS MAKING SENSE. I HAD A YOUNG STUDENT WHO PUSHED PEOPLE ALL
THE TIME. WHEN WE IDENTIFIED THE WHY, THE FUNCTION BEHIND
THAT, WE DISCOVERED IT WAS BECAUSE HE DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO TELL PEOPLE TO GET OUT OF HIS
WAY. AND SO HE WOULD PUSH THEM. WELL, WE TAUGHT HIM THE SIGN FOR MOVE WHICH
LOOKS LIKE THIS, MOVE. AND WE TAUGHT THE OTHER CHILDREN WHEN HE SIGNED
MOVE, MOVE! WELL, HE STOPPED PUSHING THE OTHER CHILDREN,
AND IT DIDN’T TAKE VERY LONG AT ALL. ANOTHER THING THAT WE CAN DO TO CHANGE BEHAVIOR
AND CREATE SAFER CHILDREN IS GIVE MORE CONTROL TO THE CHILD. WE DON’T NEED TO CONTROL ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING
THAT THE CHILD DOES. ARE THERE TIMES THAT THE CHILD CAN PICK THE
PLACE WHERE THEY WANT TO SIT IN THE ROOM, WHAT THEY WANT TO EAT FIRST, WHAT CLOTHES
THEY WANT TO WEAR. PEOPLE WHO HAVE MORE CONTROL TEND TO BE CALMER
PEOPLE. CHILDREN WHO ARE ALLOWED TO HAVE CONTROL OVER
VARIOUS ASPECTS OF THEIR LIVES USUALLY DEAL BETTER WITH THE ASPECT OF THEIR LIVES WHEN
THEY DON’T HAVE THE RIGHT TO CONTROL IT. SO GIVING MORE CONTROL AND CHOICE TO VERY
YOUNG CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS REALLY DOES HELP THEM STAY CALM AND HELPS THEM COPE WHEN
THEY CAN’T HAVE THAT CONTROL. ANOTHER WAY TO CHANGE BEHAVIOR THAT COULD
BE DANGEROUS OR PROBLEMATIC OR POTENTIALLY DANGEROUS IS TO TEACH MORE THAN ONE SKILL
TO REPLACE THE DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR. SO MAY BE IF THE CHILD HITS OTHERS, WE MIGHT
DECIDE THERE WERE MULTIPLE REASONS FOR THAT, AND SO MAYBE WE WILL TEACH THAT CHILD GESTURES
TO TELL PEOPLE TO BACK UP OR MAYBE WE WILL TEACH THAT CHILD TO HOLD HIS HAND OUT WHEN
HE WANTS THE TOY THE OTHER CHILD IS PLAYING WITH, RATHER THAN HIT THE CHILD WHO HAS THE
TOY. SOMETIMES WE NEED TO TEACH PEOPLE HOW TO SAY
STOP AND MEANING THE CHILD STOPS US. SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO TELL THEM HOW TO TELL
US WHEN THEY NEED A BREAK OR WHEN THEY WANT US TO STOP TALKING OR WHEN THEY ARE ANGRY. WE NEED TO TEACH THEM SAFE WAYS TO BE ANGRY
SUCH AS SLAPPING A TABLE WHEN YOU ARE ANGRY INSTEAD OF HITTING SOMEBODY ELSE. SO IF WE WANT TO ADDRESS THE PROBLEM OF HITTING
OTHERS, WE MAY HAVE TO REPLACE THAT DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR WITH FIVE OR SIX OTHER SKILLS. WOULDN’T THIS BE A GREAT WAY TO FOCUS THE
IEP OR WOULDN’T THIS BE A GREAT WAY TO FOCUS THE FAMILY SERVICE PLAN? TO HELP CHILDREN BE SAFER AND USE SAFE BEHAVIOR,
WE NEED TO TEACH THEM MORE COMMUNICATION SKILLS. SOME OF OUR CHILDREN CANNOT SPEAK, AND SO
IN COMMUNICATION SKILLS, I AM NOT JUST REFERRING TO WHAT THEY SHOULD SAY. PERHAPS WE ARE GOING TO USE PICTURES OR WORD
CARDS OR A VOICE OUTPUT DEVICE SO THAT THE CHILD CAN SEND MESSAGES TO OTHERS. REMEMBER THAT PART OF BEING SAFE IS ABOUT
SENDING MESSAGES TO OTHERS ABOUT WHAT THEY NEED TO DO ON YOUR BEHALF RIGHT NOW. TO CHANGE THE BEHAVIOR OF CHILDREN, IT IS
IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND THE FUNCTION OF MOTIVATION. MOTIVATION ACTUALLY CHANGES THE WAY OUR BRAINS
WORK. AS LONG AS THE CHILD MAKES THE CONNECTION
BETWEEN USING THE RIGHT BEHAVIOR, THE ASPECTS OF MOTIVATION IN THE BRAIN WILL WORK, AND
YOU WILL TRY — YOU WILL FIND THAT KIDS ARE MUCH MORE FOCUSED. NOW SOMETHING ELSE TO KEEP PEOPLE SAFE AND
ADDRESS CHANGING PROBLEMATIC BEHAVIOR OR DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR IS TO USE AN OBJECTIVE DESCRIPTION
OF THE BEHAVIOR. SOMETIMES WE ARE VERY SUBJECTIVE. SOMETIMES WE SAY “WELL, SHE DID THAT BECAUSE
SHE IS STUBBORN” OR “SHE DID THAT BECAUSE SHE IS SPOILED.” OR SHE DID THAT BECAUSE HER MOTHER LETS HER
DO THAT.” NONE OF THOSE ARE TRUE. CERTAINLY IT IS NOT THE PARENT’S FAULT WHEN
SOMEONE HAS A DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR. THEY NEED OUR HELP TO HELP THEIR CHILD CHANGE
THAT. WE WANT TO USE WORDS THAT ARE NOT SUBJECTIVE. IF SOMEONE HITS SWUNG, WE DON’T WANT TO SAY
HE ATTACKED HER VIOLENTLY. WE WANT TO SAY “HE HELD HIS HAND WITH A PALM
OPEN FIVE INCHES FROM HER ARM, AND THEN HIT HER AND IT DID NOT LEAVE A RED MARK” FOR EXAMPLE. THAT’S AN OBJECTIVE DESCRIPTION OF BEHAVIOR. WE WANT TO TAKE THE EMOTION PACKED WORDS OUT
OF THE DESCRIPTION OF THE BEHAVIOR SO WE CAN FIND OUT WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING HERE AND
THEN HOW CAN WE REALLY MAKE EFFECTIVE CHANGES. IN ORDER TO BE SAFE, ALL OF OUR CHILDREN HAVE
TO KNOW THE REAL NAME OF EVERY BODY PART. START THIS TRAINING AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE. DON’T CALL PARTS OF THEIR BODY “DOWN HERE”
OR “YOUR BOTTOM.” CALL THEM THE EXACT MEDICAL NAMES. IF YOU AREN’T SURE WHAT THOSE ARE, JUST LOOK
THEM UP. WE WANT PEOPLE TO BE ABLE TO TELL US IF SOMEBODY
TOUCHES THEM IN A CERTAIN PART OF THEIR BODY. WE WANT THEM TO BE ABLE TO TELL US IF THEY
ARE HAVING PAIN OR AN ISSUE IN CERTAIN PARTS OF THEIR BODIES. SO THEY MUST ACTUALLY KNOW THE NAME OF EVERYTHING
THAT IS PART OF THEIR BODY AND THE BODIES OF PEOPLE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX. WE ALSO NEED TO TEACH THE CHILD USING ALL
KINDS OF SKILLS THAT THE CHILD HAS, WHETHER IT IS VERBAL OR NON-VERBAL, USE OF PICTURES,
VOICE OUTPUT, DRAWINGS, WHATEVER WORKS FOR THE CHILD, THAT’S WHAT WE ARE GOING TO USE
TO TEACH THEM HOW TO USE SAFE BEHAVIOR. HERE ARE A COUPLE EVER CAUTIONS FOR, WHEN
PEOPLE ARE UPSET, WE SOMETIMES CALL IT DISREGULATED OR OUT OF CONTROL OR VERY UPSET. WHEN SOMEBODY IS ALREADY IN AN UPSET FRAME
OF MIND, THEY CAN’T LEARN ANYTHING RIGHT THAT MOMENT. YOU CANNOT TEACH AN UPSET CHILD, AND YOU SHOULD
NOT TRY TO CONSEQUENCE AN UPSET CHILD OR TELL THEM WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO THEM BECAUSE
THEY DID THE WRONG THING. IF THERE IS NO EMINENT DANGER TO HUMAN BEINGS,
DON’T TOUCH CHILDREN WHEN THEY ARE ALREADY UPSET OR DISREGULATED. BE NEARBY SO YOU CAN HELP THEM IN ANY WAY
THAT THEY NEED, PROTECT THEM FROM HARMING THEMSELVES OR OTHERS, BUT OTHERWISE, DON’T
GRAB CHILDREN WHEN THEY ARE UPSET. SOMETIMES JUST PUTTING YOUR HAND ON THEIR
SHOULDER WHEN THEY ARE UPSET TO BE REASSURING TURNS OUT TO MAKE THEM EVEN MORE UPSET BECAUSE
IT GIVES THEM MORE STIMULUS THAT THEY HAVE TO DEAL WITH. ANOTHER THING WE WANT TO DO ON A REGULAR BASIS
IS CREATE CALMING STRATEGIES FOR THE CHILD TO DO WHEN THEY ARE BEGINNING TO BECOME UPSET. THIS IS A PREVENTION METHOD. IF WE CAN TEACH CHILDREN HOW TO BE CALM MORE
OF THE TIME AND NOT BE UPSET, A LOT OF THE DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR WILL NEVER HAPPEN AT ALL. BUT, REMEMBER, YOU CAN’T TEACH SOMEBODY TO
BE CALM ONCE THEY ARE ALREADY UPSET. YOU HAVE TO DEVELOP COMMON STRATEGIES AND
PRACTICE THEM EVERY DAY WHEN NOBODY IS UPSET. THAT WAY WHEN THE CHILD IS UPSET, YOU CAN
BEGIN USING THE CALMING STRATEGY, AND THEY WILL AUTOMATICALLY BEGIN TO CALM DOWN. IT IS REALLY IMPORTANT FOR PEOPLE TO LEARN
TO CALM THEMSELVES DOWN IF THEY ARE GOING TO BE A SAFE PERSON IN OUR SOCIETY AND WORLD. IT IS SO IMPORTANT FOR ALL OF US TO BE ABLE
TO CALM OURSELVES DOWN. IT IS IMPORTANT FOR CHILDREN TO LEARN TO CALM
THEMSELVES DOWN AND NOT ALWAYS HAVE TO BE CALMED DOWN BY WHAT EVERYBODY ELSE DOES. THERE WAS A YOUNG MAN WHO WAS A CARTOONIST,
AND HE WAS A PERSON WITH DISABILITIES, BUT HE HAD GREAT ABILITY IN CARTOONING. HE WAS HIRED BY A MAJOR NEWSPAPER TO DO CARTOONS
FOR THEM. BUT HE LOST THAT JOB. EVEN THOUGH HE HAD ALL THE SKILLS NEEDED FOR
THE JOB, ONCE HE WOULD BECOME UPSET, HE WOULD HAVE TO TALK TO TWO PEOPLE FOR OVER AN HOUR
BEFORE HE COULD CALM HIMSELF DOWN. WELL, THAT’S NOT ACCEPTABLE IN THE WORLD OF
WORK AND IN SOCIETY IN GENERAL. SO EVEN WHEN OUR CHILDREN ARE VERY LITTLE,
WE WANT TO TEACH THEMSELF CALMING STRATEGIES. IT MIGHT BE TO GET IN THE ROCKING CHAIR AND
WRAP UP IN A BLANKET. IT MIGHT BE TO SING A FAVORITE SONG OR COUNT
BACKWARDS OR READ A POEM OR PICK UP A BOOK OR AN ACTIVITY. BUT WE HAVE TO TEACH CHILDREN WAYS TO CALM
THEMSELVES DOWN AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE WHILE WE PROTECT THEM FROM HARMING THEMSELVES OR
OTHERS WHILE THEY ARE UPSET. TEACHERS AND FAMILIES OFTEN STRUGGLE WITH
HOW TO CHANGE UNSAFE BEHAVIOR. LET’S HEAR FROM CYNTHIA, A PRE-SCHOOL TEACHER
AT THE SUMMIT SCHOOL ON WAYS SHE HAS PROVIDED AN ENVIRONMENT WHERE CHILDREN CAN USE CALMING
STRATEGIES. WE HAVE AN AT-RISK POPULATION. SO A LOT OF THOSE KIDS, AND FRANKLY ANY KID,
ANY GIVEN DAY, MIGHT HAVE A LOT OF WIGGLES AND JUST HAVE A LOT OF ENERGY. MAYBE THE WEATHER HASN’T BEEN THAT GREAT AND
THEY HAVEN’T HAD A CHANCE TO GO OUTSIDE. SO WE HAVE THIS AREA FOR THEM TO GO AND KIND
OF DO SOME SELF- CALMING. CHILDREN CAN’T REALLY LEARN IF THEY ARE SO
REVVED UP, THEIR BODIES ARE SO AGITATED THAT THEY CAN’T FOCUS THEIR BRAIN. WE DO THE BRAIN BODY CONNECTION. IF WE CAN GET THEIR BODY TO EXPEND SOME OF
THAT ENERGY, THEN THEY ARE MUCH MORE ABLE TO SIT AND FOCUS AND PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT
IS GOING ON AROUND THEM. SO IN THAT ROOM, WE HAVE A HANGING BAR. WE HAVE A SCOOTER THAT HAS GOT A CORD THAT
THEY CAN PULL ON. WE HAVE GOT BOLSTERS. I LOVE THE BOLSTERS. THE KIDS CAN HANG ON THE BOLSTER, PUT THEIR
ARMS DOWN AND DO THE WHEELBARROW, GETS GREAT INPUT INTO THEIR JOINTS SO YOU GET THAT WHOLE
BODY AWARENESS THING. WE ALSO HAVE A GREAT–IT IS A GIANT ROLLING
PIN, AND IT IS GOOD BECAUSE THEY GET INPUT ALL OVER THEIR BODY. SO THEY CAN LIE ON THEIR TUMMIES, AND WE CAN
ROLL THEM OUT, AND THEN THEY CAN LIE ON THEIR BACKS AND WE CAN ROLL OUT ARMS AND LEGS. THEY THINK IT IS GREAT. WE TELL THEM WE ARE MAKING PIZZA, AND WE ARE
MAKING BREAD DOUGH. THEY GET TO PRETEND. IT’S REALLY WONDERFUL. THEY GET THAT INPUT. THEY GET TO EXPEND THAT ENERGY IN A POSITIVE
WAY. ONE OF THE THINGS I REALLY LIKE TO DO IS JUST
TAKE A DEEP BREATH. I DIDN’T REALIZE WHEN I GO, (BREATHING IN
AND OUT) THE KIDS WERE COPYING THE MOTION AS WELL, AND THAT’S ALSO A YOGA MOVE. (LAUGHING) SO THE KIDS NOW, IF I TELL EVERYONE,
“OKAY, LET’S TAKE A DEEP BREATH,” THEY ALL DO THE WHOLE THING, (BREATHING IN AND OUT)
SO THEY ARE GETTING THE DEEP BREATH. THEY ARE GETTING THE MOVEMENT AND IT’S GREAT. THEY GET CENTERED. EVERYBODY STOPS TALKING FOR A MOMENT, AND
I GET THEIR ATTENTION. HERE ARE SOME OTHER IMPORTANT GOALS THAT WE
COULD WORK ON WHEN PRIORITIZING SAFETY. DON’T GIVE YOUR MONEY TO THE FIRST PERSON
WHO ASKS. I ALWAYS LIKE TO GIVE CHILDREN A WALLET WITH
A LITTLE BIT OF MONEY IN IT IN THEIR BACKPACK AND THEN TEACH OTHER PEOPLE LIKE THE ADULTS
TO ASK THEM FOR THAT MONEY AND TEACH THE CHILD TO SAY “NO, THAT’S MY MONEY.” THAT’S A WAY TO KEEP THEM FROM BEING VICTIMIZED
BY OTHERS. AND DON’T BUY SOMETHING FROM SOMEBODY WHO
WANTS YOUR MONEY BEFORE YOU SEE WHAT YOU ARE BUYING. DON’T GO INTO SOMEBODY’S HOUSE UNINVITED. EVEN IF THEY ARE REALLY GOOD FRIENDS, AND
EVEN IF YOU ARE NORMALLY WELCOMED THERE. THERE ARE SOME SKILLS THAT ARE NECESSARY TO
BE SAFE MEDICALLY. FOR EXAMPLE, WE NEED TO TEACH CHILDREN FROM
A VERY EARLY AGE TO INHALE THROUGH THEIR NOSE AND EXHALE THROUGH THEIR MOUTH WHEN THE DOCTOR
HAS THE STETHOSCOPE ON THEIR BACK. IN THIS WAY, WE CAN FIND SITUATIONS LIKE EARLY
PNEUMONIA MUCH EARLIER. SO THAT’S A GREAT THING TO TEACH YOUR CHILDREN
TO DO, TO INHALE, AND EXHALE THROUGH THEIR MOUTH. WE ALSO NEED TO TEACH CHILDREN TO ALLOW THEIR
TEMPERATURE TO BE TAKEN WITH A STANDARD THERMOMETER, NOT A DIGITAL ONE BECAUSE SOMETIMES DOCTORS
WILL WANT TO TAKE THEIR TEMPERATURE THAT WAY. WE NEED TO TEACH THEM TO ALLOW US TO LOOK
IN THEIR EYES, TO LOOK IN THEIR EARS, TO LOOK IN THEIR NOSES, AND TO LOOK IN THEIR MOUTHS. THESE ARE ALL MEDICAL SAFETY SKILLS. NOW THAT WE KNOW HOW IMPORTANT SAFETY SKILLS
ARE, WE CAN PRIORITIZE THEM. WE CAN WORK ON THEM. WE CAN REPLACE DANGEROUS BEHAVIOR WITH SAFE
BEHAVIOR. AND WE CAN CREATE THE BEST POSSIBLE OUTCOMES
FOR ALL OF OUR CHILDREN.

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skincare hacks for winter

hi guys welcome back today I'm going to talk you through some of my winter beauty essentials these are the
Seo Yea Ji Berantem Sama Go Kyung Pyo ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿ˜ฑ  #PotatoStar  ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฉ INDO SUB ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฉ
Park Seo Joon Sudah Menyukai Park Min Young Sejak Lama ๐Ÿ˜ #WhatsWrongwithSecretaryKim ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฉ INDO SUB ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ฉ

One Reply to “Reaching and Teaching: Promoting Safety (Video #188)”

  1. Let's talk! What are your ideas about promoting safety for young children? Do you have questions or comments about this video? Is there a topic you'd like to see covered by a future Apples Video Magazine? Let us know your thoughts!

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